My Baby....

is 2 years old.

It's one of those weird moments for me. When you know that time is passing/has passed. Yet, somehow it doesn't seem like it. I remember feeling Sam kick and roll inside me (and how much I missed that feeling, that assurance, after he was born). I remember holding him in my arms at 3 in the morning, watching his sweet, sleeping face, trying to make that moment last forever.

Now, millions of moments later, my sweet boy is sleeping in his room. Wrapped in two blankets, snuggled with his doctor bear, easter bunny, little bear, and sippy cup.

Some days I can hardly remember what it felt like before I was Mom (like now, as I try to list the things that filled my days and my heart). Some days I remember exactly what it was like (like yesterday, when it was dinner time and I hadn't showered and Sam woke up cranky and insisted on sitting on my lap for dinner and was still cranky).

Every day I hear Sam call to me from his bed. Most days, he greets me with a smile; always with a hug. He shares his snacks with me (whether I ask him to or not). I see his smile as he is surprised by something new or recognizes an old familiar joy. I am the one who understands 73.6% of his jabber. I am the one who gives him his string cheese, thus eternally securing my indispensable position in this household. I get to see all the things he remembers, like the time we built a fort and put all of his balls on top and then punched, poked, and pushed them off--and wants to repeat it. And how he starts saying "push" as soon as we pull into a store parking lot and insists on pushing my grocery cart and dropping the (sturdy) items in.

Every day I am surprised by how grown he is, how mature he seems, how he is not my little baby anymore. Every night, I rock him in my arms and he hugs me around the neck and I am surprised how well he still fits in my arms. Every night I pray for his health and happiness. Every night I thank my Father in Heaven for his presence.

Happy Birthday, Sam. I love you.

...way back then...

...not as "way back" then...

(1st birthday, 2008)

...now...

*pictures & news of the festivities to come...once we've festivitized.